We had no clue why we weren’t happily married.. We knew we loved each other BUT felt at times that wasn’t enough!!!
“To love without knowing how to love wounds the person we love!” -unknown
We usually show our partners love the way we receive love instead of the way they receive love.
We may purchase them nice gifts and do all these acts of service when all they wanted was a simple hug and some words of affirmation. Now you’re frustrated!!!
The concept of The Five Love Language was written by Gary Chapman. He tells us the secret to get to our partner’s heart!
Here are the Five Love Languages:
This isn’t what you really think it is. It is really about feeling secure and a sense of belonging in the relationship. Yes, holding hands, hugs, gentle touches on arm, leg, etc. are important but if your spouse’s love language is physical touch they want to feel your physical presence.
Give me your undivided attention. The greatest gift you can give someone is your time. You have to be there. I’m remind of my favorite movie, Love & Basketball, when Omar tells Sanaa that she forgot to be there for him. Nothing else mattered to him more than her time. Put your phone down, turn the tv off, or no other distractions and have a quality conversation or a quality date night.
Words of Affirmation
Here your words speak louder than your actions. Yes, I know it’s reversed but when this is their love language they need to hear it. The words, “I Love You” mean so much to this person. You can’t stop there though you have to tell them the reasons why you love them too. They want all the kind, encouraging, and positive feedback because this gives them life!
This isn’t really about physical gifts it more about your thoughtfulness, it can be something as simple as their favorite candy. They are more interested in the efforts behind the gift. It’s not about what the item is, just make sure it shows that you care and how thoughtful you are. The like to have tangible things to represent your love and know they are treasured.
Acts of Service
Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities on your spouse will speak volumes to them. They love to hear, “let me do that for you!” You have to find ways to do things that will take things off their plate often!
p style=”text-align: center;”>Why Does Love Languages Matter?
You think you’ll have a better marriage and teammate in your spouse if you don’t speak their love language?
Yeah…NO…that’s not the case.
Instead, you are driving a wedge in between the two of you because you’re refusing to show love the way they receive it.
When you stop making excuses and actually start being intentional then you will begin to see some MAJOR results..
Do you even know your own Love Language? Use this link to take the quiz. https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/couples-quiz//
Figure out the best way to speak your spouse’s love language! Leave us a comment with what your love language is and what your spouse’s love language is.